What we Want – What we Love

When we are young and in a battle to like ourselves, we fall in love with someone to the extent that they match our ideal picture; as if we will be given a score for our choice.

When we have seen and been more, when we learn to look deeper, then we fall in love with someone’s ability to love.

That is what we are supposed to look for, and the number of failed and unhappy relationships and marriages might confirm my suspicion that many people have not yet learnt this.

We should fall in love, above all, with someone’s ability to love.

If love is the highest ‘command’ the purest path, surely it is the thing to look for in a partner or friend?

I was blind for too long.

2 thoughts on “What we Want – What we Love”

  1. I like this SO much! And I’m intrigued to notice some of the traces of what you’re saying in why I like my friends so much :)

    I wonder about growing my own ability to love…. (aka becoming then more attractive..hehe). Perhaps good relationship matches are people who love at similar frequency/volume/capacity. Perhaps the magic of lasting relationships then lies in learning to grow together, encourage one another, to grow in one’s individual capacity to love, at a semi-similar pace.

  2. I love reading your thoughts Schalk, a true privilege!
    I think God has programmed our core to gravitate towards love, acts of it, giving love freely and recognizing in others the ability/willingness/”wantingness”( I’ve just created a new word – whoohooo) to love!
    AdriMarie – I’d love to grow my own ability to love, om n hart te he soos n taxi – waar daar altyd plek is vir nog n persoon

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